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“I can’t remember anything without you”
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) dir. Michel Gondry
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i don’t pay attention to the
it has ended for me
and began again in the morning.
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Go after her. Fuck, don’t sit there and wait for her to call. Go after her because that’s what you should do if you love someone, don’t wait for them to give you a sign because it might never come. Don’t let people happen to you, don’t let me happen to you, or her, she’s not a fucking television show or tornado. There are people I might have loved had they gotten on the airplane or run down the street after me or called me up drunk at four in the morning because they need to tell me right now and because they cannot regret this and I always thought I’d be the only one doing crazy things for people who would never give enough of a fuck to do it back or to act like idiots or be entirely vulnerable and honest and making someone fall in love with you is easy and flying 3000 miles on four days notice because you can’t just sit there and do nothing and breathe into telephones is not everyone’s idea of love but it is the way I can recognize it because that is what I do. Go scream it and be with her in meaningful ways because that is beautiful and that is generous and that is what loving someone is, that is raw and that is unguarded, and that is all that is worth anything, really.
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Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most. Of everything. They make you feel so alive that you’d follow them straight into hell, just to keep getting your fix.
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Space isn’t easy to come by in urban areas, so one London flat owner decided to maximize the small space they have by creating a suspended bedroom. Rather than deal with a pull-out sofa, they decided to use some of their air space by hanging their bed from the ceiling. The sleeping area even includes a large skylight and walk out to the 500 sq ft roof top garden, so there’s no way you can feel claustrophobic.
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So I sit here at one of my best friend’s house, she’s gone to work and my god-daughter is still asleep. I’m contemplating a lot of things at the moment - where I stand, where I’m headed and from where I’ve come.
Overall, I’m a happy person, but lately I’ve been questioning myself a lot more. Perhaps it’s because of Mercury Retrograde combined with last weeks full moon.
I want love, the kind that is strong enough to withstand the storms of life. The kind which is unyielding and unrelenting despite the doubt that may come out of fear. I had that once, but his part wasn’t as strongly upheld as mine, thus a heartbreak.
I know it’s coming. I know it’s out there. I’m not one to be patient and perhaps that’s my biggest flaw.
Whatever the case may be, I’ll keep scrolling through reading these sappy love posts and inspirational things in hopes it ignites something within me to do/be/see/feel better.
Typewriter Series #810 by Tyler Knott Gregson
*I wrote this poem for our amazing and dear friends Suzanne and Meghan for their wedding we photographed in New Jersey last month. Love is Love is Love and I cannot wait til the entire world stops pretending it isn’t, and starts investing their energy and attentions on issues that actually Should be issues. Congratulations @s_neglia and @meghoffman , we love you guys and cannot wait to see you again.*
"Om Namo Baghavate Vasudevaya"
But do not ask me where I am going,
As I travel in this limitless world,
Where every step I take is my home.
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